Helping women who have experienced abuse and want to live healthy and fearless lives.

Walking Tall

I live in northern Wisconsin which is the land of extreme beauty–springs that brings new life and energy; summer that is sunny, warm and overflowing with nature’s gifts; fall with colors that take your breath away; and winter with snow, stillness and a kind of majesty all its own.

We’ve just been blessed with lots of moisture (which we need)–snow, rain-snow mix, rain and freezing rain.

After almost 8 years of living in fear walking on ice, I ordered my Stabilicers from LLBean. I opened that package, slipped those suckers on my winter boots and I was s-e-t. I now became one fearless walking freak in any winter condition. Seriously, I am one happy camper.

Imagine this. Me defying all the odds. Walking taller than tall. Shoulder back, head looking up and marching with the cadence of my two labs. It felt like I was climbing Mount Everest.

This was a simple fear to conquer. Buy boot gear, get fearless. Easy-peasy!

There are other fears that are much more deeply entrenched–some we’re not even aware of–that we work through in other ways. And…it’s not like we can order “it” up from a catalog. It takes courage, self-appreciation and a tenacious spirit to want to arrive at better place–your “there.” Emerging from overt or covert abuse is not for the faint-hearted. Thriving beyond it is possible–trust me, I am living proof.

The Small Little Voice

As a child in my home, the unspoken, but fiercely understood, rule was that “children were to be seen and not heard.” If I spoke out of turn or–heaven forbid–questioned “why” I was dealt with swiftly. Fear shut down my audible voice, but the inner voice raged and was generally pissed off at being misunderstood, unappreciated and squelched.

I was born with a intuitive gift to speak the truth, asked powerful questions and come from a place of curiosity. It’s me. It’s my fiber. It’s like air to me. It’s flows through my veins.

So for 30 some years, I lived the family rule. I kept my inner voice quiet…except…when I couldn’t hold it in anymore and it periodically came out in volcano-like frustration and anger. Not a nice ride.

I didn’t order a package from LLBean for this one. It came into my life as a gift. A new awareness. A class called Assertiveness. I sat speechless when I learned that my voice mattered. That what I had to say mattered. That there was a win-win way of having a conversation, I literally felt like I’d been re-born with a new spirit, new heart, new freedom and a new Lee.

I re-wired old beliefs that weren’t supporting me. I reclaimed my true spirit. I celebrate that everyday.

Grow Beyond Your Circumstances

When abuse comes, it can steal and destroy. We each have the choice of growing where we are planted. Beginning again. This day. At the moment. Gifts of help are available in the form of new skills, broader understanding, and lavish support. Moving beyond–by choice. Growing–by choice. Living your way–by choice.

Staying stuck is also a choice. You and I are worthy women. Worthy of living who God created us to be–in all our fullness.

We are not our life circumstance. We are what we do in spite with our life circumstances. Find the gift that helps you unlock your fear and supports you to move towards what you want. Coaches are great for that. I’m a coach that would love to support you in getting to your “there.”

Blessings, Lee

{ 2 comments }