The Good. The Bad. And The Ugly.

This photo is of my new and improved Family. Like it? I’m the big, bad protective mom on the right. Gun in hand and ready for life. Those are my kids: Mandy, Bill and Sam.

It was the best of times. It was the worst of times.

Them thar’ were just plain scary times.

The Good

What the heck could be good about dissolving a marriage and leading my own wagon train?

For me, it meant being honest to myself that I had married the wrong man for the wrong reasons.

It meant being authentic about what’s real. It meant casting off what looked good and facing the truth.

It meant looking in the mirror and seeing, maybe for the first time, that I was worthy. What I thought, felt and needed was dang important.

I mattered. Now there’s some good stuff!

The Bad

I went gangbusters off into this new free-to-be-me life. I truly believed that my kids and I would ride off into the sunset and there would be bliss.

Ahhhh…but the attacks came and I needed to circle my wagons.

Attacks came from outside. Shunning from many. Lost friends. Arrows from my family. And a causality…my daughter.

Twelve years I showed up with my trusty steed to connect with my daughter. Love and tenacity prevailed, but not without pain for her–and me.

Attacks came from inside. “You are just a varmint, Lee. You are a low-down, no-good mom, ya know. Ya shoulda stayed.” Pain for me.

And The Ugly

The ugliest part of this was letting go of an allusion of life post marriage. I thought it was going to be a gentle ride on an easy horse into a beautiful sunset.

Not. Enter reality.

I had no skills. No college degree. The courts were not kind. Panic.

My Sunset

Fast forward near 30 years. I’ve left my wagon, horses and gun behind. And I’m looking at life through my lense of gratitude for lessons learned.

So what did I learn as the trail boss of my life and family? Here are some gems:

• Even if I want change, change is hard.
• There are consequences for my choices—period.
• Being myself is better than living a lie.
• Living my life is better than deferring to someone else’s.
• Giving grace is love–to myself and others.
• Boundaries are like air; I can’t live without them and be fully alive.
• Needs are present whether I deny them or not.
• I can’t play “happy” forever.
• A degree doesn’t equal brilliance–tenacious love does.
• Being me is worth fighting for.
• Saboteurs don’t determine what I think about myself–I do.
• Life if a journey, not a destination.
• Pain usually does equal gain…dang it.
• Present moment living brings me peace.
• Working at relationships is life.
• Love = Life.

There’s more…but you get the picture. Does any of this resonate with you?

The truth for me has been that great stuff can come out of a “good, bad & ugly” situation. But you have to be on the lookout.

What’s your pain? Where do you want gain? Coaching can support you in making that happen—if you are willing.

Do you have passion to move forward to get what you really want in your life? Then you are my ideal client.

The best way to see if coaching is for you is to try it out. Go for it and schedule a time together. Come with questions; come for coaching; come for you!

You are worth it.

Blessings, Coach Lee